BY MICHAEL MUSTO | Provincetown, Massachusetts is a mixed (but heavily queer) resort town with lobsters, beaches, and lots of tucking and plucking, the prime season running through September and beyond. Here’s a rundown of my latest trip there, specifically involving which drag queens provided the most entertaining distraction from panic—and what they wore. 

PLASMA

Hailing from Austin, Texas, young drag star Plasma (RuPaul’s Drag Race, Season 16) is shiny and new, yet radiates old school aesthetics and iconography. It’s a refreshing mix! I’d enjoyed her videos—including a fiery Don’t Rain on My Parade and a letter-perfect tribute to 1950s musical star Dolores Gray—so I wasn’t surprised that her My Name is Plasma: A Tribute To Barbra Streisand show at Pilgrim House (closed, August 11) is an irresistible tribute to the ultimate singer. Rather than do a slavish impersonation, Plasma creates a loving homage, gently stepping into Barbra’s persona and delivering on all counts. Her wonderfully sung version of Sondheim’s life-affirming Everybody Says Don’t—her old audition song—is a knockout that convinces you to say “Do!” Her People is soothingly wise. And she kills with Happy Days Are Here Again—so much so that, after the show, I  quipped, “Who needs Judy?” (Explanation: Babs and Judy famously duetted on Happy Days/Get Happy on Judy’s TV show in 1963.) Plasma reminded me that Barbra had been singing Happy Days even before the legendary duet!

In the show, Plasma tells the moving story of how her old math teacher realized that Plasma wanted to become a drag star, so he handed her $500 to buy shoes and wished her well. Another mentor, Carson Kressley, was in the audience, so Plasma cracked, “I’m glad I’m seeing you again. Otherwise, our last interaction would be you saying you didn’t like my outfit.”

Plasma’s next stop? Let’s pray it’s Broadway!

DINA MARTINA

In her Crown & Anchor show, Dina Martina—Now Living! (through September 13), the long-running diva doesn’t disappoint when it comes to deadpan wit and wonderful weirdness. “I was just a toddler,” remembers Dina, “when my mother and I moved to Vegas so she could pursue her dream of becoming a compulsive gambler.” And there was so much glamour ahead for little Dina, particularly just a few months ago, when she had some very important beauty work done.  As the lady recalls, “I had the fat extracted from between my toes and had them inject it between my second and third chins, ‘cus I’m going for that bullfrog look.” Mission accomplished!

In a mildly Elvisy jumpsuit, festooned with glitter, Dina is a scream, singing In a Big Country (for no particular reason) and occasionally erupting into the thick Scottish brogue of the original version. Dina is a dizzying provocateur who marches to her own broken drum and  always gives us life—and catharsis. 

VARLA JEAN MERMAN

A Ptown star for three whole decades, Varla has possibly her best show ever with the rip-roaring Varla Jean Merman: The Drowsy Chappell Roan at Crown & Anchor through September 20. The show explodes onto the stage as a meditation on current divas (Roan, Sabrina Carpenter, etc.), along with a personal journey capped by the realization that Varla feels she might not be an international pop diva herself. But I beg to differ. Along the way, she once did a wonderfully gross promo for MTV, got some flattering praise from Sir Elton John (though he kept mentioning how “large” she is) and even found out that Chappell Roan is aware of her and even approves! So do I. Witty Varla is expert at working a crowd—and a theme—and she’s always backed by top-tier tech. Brava, diva.

JUDY GOLD

Not a drag queen at all, Judy Gold is one of the most hilarious lesbians on earth and she delivered again in her one performance of Judy Gold: What The FU Tour 2025 at Post Office Cafe & Cabaret. She’d planned a whole run, but then got booked to go to L.A. and do a TV show. The woman has entered yet another heavily-in-demand chapter of her life. (A venue spokesperson assured us she’ll be back by August 28 for a run through September 11, and then back in October for some additional dates.)

No one does exasperated angst like Judy, and indeed, she took us through all the indignities of her life—from kvetchy people on the street to the bizarrely retro Stop & Shop supermarket in Ptown—and how she fights back, usually by yelling some wittier variation of “Fuck you!,” lol. A riff on how miniscule Trump’s penis must be is a riot. (Apparently, Melania only goes after it when she needs to floss.) Judy even discussed her trip to Israel this year, which culminated with her terrifyingly having to take refuge in a hotel shelter! (She also says some serious words about the Israeli/Palestine situation. As always, Judy’s emotional heft and decency makes her comedy all the richer.) But mainly, Judy Gold’s kvetches are pure comic joy. I can never get enough.

ANITA COCKTAIL

A drag Wonder Woman, Anita Cocktail seemingly can do it all—book talent, organize it, sing, work the crowd, and also be a fabulous fashion plate. That’s all on view at Drag Show at Crown & Anchor (Saturdays through September 27), where Anita puts together varying drag lineups for a delectable pupu platter of fierceness. Among the guest stars when I saw the revue were Tommie Ross, doing a blissful Diana Ross, and Edie, the leggy showgirl who did Let Me Entertain You complete with Gypsy-style wisecracks. And Anita was a marvel, keeping things moving while also showing her serious side. (She talked about the importance of the community rising up together and fighting back. At another point, she had a dumb heckler evicted! “The main part of watching a show is listening,” Anita instructed, as the guy was made to reacquaint himself with the outside world.) 

SCARLETT STRAUSS

Managing to be both innocent and sexy, Scarlett (who hails from Salem, Massachusetts) is appealing in her Blonde Ambitions show at The Art House (through September 10). She’s young and will surely learn to avoid pitchiness–and to work more on show structure—in the future, but she looks gorgeous and has a strong set of pipes that make her one of the best live voices in town. Scarlett did well with songs by Madonna and Marilyn and scored with For The Gaze from Death Becomes Her—not an easy number to do as a solo. I’ll be watching her blonde ambitions keep soaring.

TINA BURNER

I always avoided drag brunch because I don’t want a drag queen screaming, “Make some noise” in my face as I’m trying to eat my eggs. But the Tina-hosted Burner Brunch at Crown & Anchor (Sundays, 11am & 1pm) turns out to be the opposite of annoying. First of all, the food consisted of a fabulous buffet that included steak, salmon, lasagna, waffles, and fruit salad. Amazing. And Tina—from RuPaul’s Drag Race, Season 13—was on fire, ripping into both lip syncs and live vocals while also sprinkling in constant comedy and audience interactions. Her material included Liza Minnelli, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, and Mommie Dearest, though Tina made it all seem as fresh as the waffles! And there were guest stars too!

THE GOLDEN MEAN GIRLS 

Every summer, Jamie Morris weighs in with a summer parody, previous ones ranging from The Devil Wears Payless to Schartt’s Creek. Well, his new to-do at Post Office Cafe and Cabaret (through September 14) is a lively mashup of female-laden classics (Golden Girls meets Mean Girls), the ultra game cast including Morris himself as Blanche Devereaux. It’s as fetch as a plate of cheesecake.

Michael Musto is a columnist, pop cultural and political pundit, NYC nightlife chronicler, author, and the go-to gossip responsible for the long-running (1984-2013) Village Voice column, “La Dolce Musto.” His work appears on this website as well as Queerty.com and thedailybeast.com, and he is writing for the Village Voice, which made its debut in April of 2021. Follow Musto on Instagram, via @michaelmusto.

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